Watching Your Time

I’m very time-deprived these days. Many people complain to me about this problem. That’s why I’m so delighted to have Dave Crenshaw today as my guest. He’s the foremost expert in helping you get time, and has helped students worldwide get more time for everything they love most in life.

Beware Time Liabilities
By Dave Crenshaw

Are you surrounded by Time Liabilities? I define a Time Liability as:

a) anything that consumes time unnecessarily or
b) anything that causes you to spend time in activities that are less profitable than your most profitable activity.

If your filing system causes you to spend extra time doing $9 per hour 
clerical work, trying to find that important document you misplaced,
 then you have a Time Liability. If your workspace is so uncomfortable 
that you have to spend time at a chiropractor every month to correct
 your spine alignment problems, you definitely have a Time Liability!

Over a year ago I was working with a business owner who was in severe
 time debt. He was working in the ballpark of 90 to 100 hours per week,
 and both his business and family were suffering. We started by 
calculating his per-hour worth. When doing his most profitable 
activities, he was worth $500 an hour or more. Yet we found that he was
 spending approximately half of his time, 45 hours or more per week,
 performing $25/hour, $10/hr, and even minimum wage type work! Why? A
 huge factor was that he was surrounded by Time Liabilities.

At one point during our training he needed to punch holes in some paper
 for a three ring binder. Yet when he went to punch the paper, his paper 
puncher clearly wasn’t up for the job. He had bought a cheap model that
 had was basically broken after a month of use. I watched as this
 business owner kept turning his stack of papers around twice to punch.
 Most often he kept misaligning the punch and ruining the stack.

Next, he stood up from his desk, walked out of his office, marched down 
the hall to someone else’s office, searched for their high-quality
 paper puncher, punched the holes in his stack, came back to the office
 and finally inserted them in the planner. While he went through this
 long process, I timed him without him knowing. It took about 6 minutes.

I 
asked the question, “How many times per week do you repeat that 
activity of having to use someone else’s hole puncher?” He replied, “I 
don’t know. Maybe 3 or 4.” I responded, “So, you’re losing more than 
an hour per month simply because you didn’t spend the extra $20 to get 
a quality 3 hole puncher?” His response, “I didn’t think of it like 
that at the time!” His cheap 3-hole puncher was potentially costing him 
nearly $500 per month…and that was just one Time Liability holding him
 back!

How much are your time liabilities costing you
 at work? If you know what you are worth per hour, you can quickly
 estimate the dollar-per hour impact of lost time. Any resource or
 system or behaviors at work that keeps you away from your profitable 
activities is a Time Liability. Replace Time liabilities with Time 
Assets. The sooner you replace them, the sooner your profitability will
 increase.

Are you surrounded by time liabilities? Consider the following questions:

* Are
 the tools of your trade (computer, pens, stapler, etc) all within hand’s 
reach? (If you often have to get up from you chair to pull out the 
scissors you use often, then you have a time liability.)

* Do 
you have the tools you need or is something missing? (Have you been 
putting off going to the office supply or computer store?)

* Do 
they all work properly? (If you have to squint or lean forward to view
 your computer screen, then it is likely a time liability…either that or
 your glasses!)

* Are your tools of the
 best working quality? (Remember the story of the three-hole puncher. Invest more to get better results and greater longevity from the “tools
 of your trade”.)

By trading your Time Liabilities 
for Time Assets, you will save time, be more productive, and reduce 
stress in the long run.
------

Dave Crenshaw has appeared in TIME magazine, on XM and Sirius Radio, MSN Money, and been interviewed in radio and TV stations across North America. His book, The Myth of Multitasking: How ‘Doing It All’ Gets Nothing Done has been translated into six languages and is a time management best seller. He is the foremost expert in helping you get time, and has helped students worldwide get more time for everything they love most in life.

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Law of Attraction in Action: Smiling

This is post 39 in my series on the Law of Attraction in Action. You CAN use your power to attract all that you need. I do it every day! Read the posts in this series to see how.

I don’t think that people smile enough. I always find it odd when people comment about how I’m smiling most of the time, like it’s unusual. I smiled a lot as a kid because I was very happy growing up. Loving parents, lots of friends, caring neighbors, doing well in school all contributed to my contentment. I smiled so much that teachers complained to my mom that it made them nervous!

Then I became an adult, and a DoorMat, and the smiling stopped.

Living for everyone but me gave me little to smile about. I passed time instead of living. Back then, happiness meant not feeling hurt by someone who let me down or missing things I wanted to do because I helped someone with their needs instead. Living to avoid pain or in fear of being alone if you don’t please everything doesn’t bring happiness, hence few smiles.

Not smiling doesn’t attract smiling people and reasons to smile.

When I began my journey out of DoorMatville, I remembered how to smile. The more I did for me, the more I smiled. Eventually I found the happy girl I used to be and became a deliriously happy woman. The more I loved me, the happier I became and the more I smiled. Now I wake up smiling every day. I also learned the benefits of sharing my smiles with others.

Smiling attracts more smiles and rewards that can make you smile more.

People in stores I go to regularly or other people I don't know well began to call me Little Star or other names indicating they saw my smile as twinkling and liked it. Living in NYC, I tend to be a bit insular when I walk around, and I walk a lot. I occasionally get annoyed by men making comments about my body or just trying to talk me up when I don’t want the attention. So I began to walk with blinders on and ignore any talking at me. One day I was speed walking across town and passed a guy sitting on a stoop who said something to me. I ignored him. He quickly told me to smile, because he thought it would be a lovely one.

I slowed up, turned around, and smiled. He smiled brightly back. It warmed the rest of my day.

Now I try to smile more when I’m in public places. I passed an older lady using a walker and smiled at her. The smile she gave me back expressed gratitude and joy. I was on the subway this week when a grungy looking man came on and announced he was hungry and could anyone spare a few cents. As I walked to the door at my station, I gave him a dollar. He muttered thanks. Then I looked him straight in the eye and smiled.

I can still feel his joy radiating. He gave me a huge happy smile. He got a dollar but I got a priceless gift. It put me into a great mood for that whole day.

Now I smile even more. When I do, I get more smiles back. They’re contagious. And the Law of Attraction attracts more. I didn’t see many smiles in my unsmiling DoorMat days. Now they’re all around me!

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Find Your Mountain

I always encourage taking baby steps. Goals can seem daunting otherwise, which can make you give up before you get started. Pursuing most dreams intimidated me back in my active DoorMat days. I’d want something, think about how hard it would be and move on.

I learned a lot about the POWER of taking baby steps when I climbed my first mountain.
I’ve always loved hiking but don’t get much opportunity to do it living in NYC. I had decent stamina but had never done an almost straight up steep climb. I was in a national park out west. My friend, who climbed regularly, told me I could do it. As I looked at the switchback trail that zigzagged across the steep mountain, I had my doubts. I’m used to hikes that go up and down, more like a rolling climb than straight up. Intimidation began to overwhelm me, along with what ifs—what if I disappointed my friend by stopping near the bottom?? What if I couldn’t get down because I was too tired??

But I wanted to climb that mountain very much and reminded myself of the importance of taking baby steps.

A mountain can’t be climbed without taking the first step. Then you can take the second one. Looking up seemed daunting, but each step took me closer. That day when I climbed my first mountain, going even halfway up seemed impossible. But each step led to another. Reaching each ridge motivated me to take more steps. I stopped looking up to the top and kept my eyes glued to the step in front of me. Looking up made it seem too far and too hard. Looking just ahead kept me focused.

Confucius said, “A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.”

Whether it’s climbing a mountain or achieving a goal, take the first step! Then another. Do small things differently or do one thing that’s necessary to get further. It may feel wobbly but you can learn to find your balance. I stretched a lot to keep my body in good shape for the climb. Take practice steps to give you the strength to keep going. When I was halfway up the mountain, I stood there, looking out at the panoramic view around me. That made me want to go higher and see more!

Taking baby steps motivates taking more!

When I consciously take each step to try something new or to overcome a fear I can still get scared. But, exhilaration takes over as I got small results. If one thing doesn’t work, I try again. Each step increases empowerment. Even stopping progress without backsliding is a power move. Sometimes when I'm controlling my eating and go to a party, I pig out. But, I get right back to healthy eating and feel revved if I don't gain weight or I can quickly lose the pounds from overindulging. That's success too!

When there are setbacks, how you handle them determines whether you progress or quit. When I got tired climbing, instead of giving up on getting to the top, I stopped and took a break. Then I’d look down and realize how high I’d climbed. That motivated to take more steps!

Fight excuses to postpone action and prompt yourself to continue to take baby steps.

Climbing that first mountain taught me how far baby steps could take me. When I succeed at one step, I feed on the satisfaction of progress. Like building something, you need a foundation. Baby steps create one for a happier self. I hold onto the experience of climbing that mountain in my heart. When something seems hard, I remind myself that if I could climb a mountain, I can achieve other things with baby steps.

Find your own mountain—any accomplishment that seemed too hard, or impossible, until you took the first steps.

Climbing a mountain can be real like it was for me, or an analogy for overcoming obstacles. Conquering a fear or limitation or belief that something can’t be done or someone saying that you can’t do something shows what you can do. Whatever it is, that’s the mountain you climbed. The good feelings can motivate you in the future. When I did my first firewalk, the leader had us write on an index card, “I walked on fire and learned I can do anything I choose.”

Successes show you how much you’re capable of. Think about something that represents your own mountain—a fear you overcame, a task that took time but you persevered to figure out, an adventure you never thought you could do but did, a limitation you conquered, something hard that you learned to do.

Write on an index card or paper, “I_________, I can do anything I choose!” Put it somewhere prominent. Mine is still on my bedroom mirror so I can see it every day.

Empower yourself by finding your own mountain experience that you used baby steps to conquer. Read that paper over and over when you get scared or want to back out. Hold onto the good feelings you had when you baby stepped to conquer your mountain. You really can do anything you CHOOSE. It begins with that first baby step.

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She Was Late and I Left!

I was just thinking about my trip upstate to do an event this weekend and felt a little pang of guilt over something I did that seemed small compared to the rest of my activities that lovely day. Liz, a woman I know lives near the location of my talk. When I told her I’d be coming up there, we made plans to have lunch before my talk. My talk was at 2 PM. I told her I’d get there close to noon and would call when I was at the exit so she could head out to meet me.

I called when I was about 5 miles from the exit to give her some warning. Liz suggested a nice restaurant. I asked if I should meet her in the shopping center by my event or was there somewhere more convenient. She directed me to a spot along the road into town with some dirt parking. She said she’d be there in 10 minutes, adding she’d just had a shower and had to get ready. Hmm, I said I’d be there around noon and she wasn’t ready. She assured me it wouldn’t take long when I said I didn’t have a lot to time.

But it did! But the time we hung up, I was at the exit and the place to meet at was right there. It was a parking area with rocks and mud. I was dying to get out of the car after my long ride but it was unappealing. I sat there for 20 minutes, on the side of the road, surrounded by overgrown weeds, big puddles and dirt. I didn’t get up early and allow time to drive up to have a relaxing lunch to sit in this ugly place, bored. I tried to call Liz at home but no answer. Her cell phone wasn’t on.

So I did what I teach other Nice Girls on Top to do—I left, drove to the shopping center and went to a restaurant solo. I felt empowered!

Liz called twenty minutes later. She yelled at me. “Where are you? I was there! At 12:20.” But she wasn’t since I was there past 12:30. I told her she should have been ready and I couldn’t reach her by phone. I didn’t want to waste more time in that awful spot. She denied being so late and scolded me for not leaving her a message at home since she’d forgotten to bring my cell number with her. I told her, calmly, that none of it was my fault and refused to apologize for any of it.

Then I said I had to hang up as I wanted to enjoy my lunch. She blustered but said goodbye.

Ten minutes later Liz called back. She’d calmed down, must have accepted she was wrong, and asked if she could join me for lunch. I nicely agreed and she came over. This time she apologized, acknowledged she tends to be late for everything and that she shouldn’t have told me to meet her in that desolate spot. I agreed with her but said no more and was friendly. There was no point in being mad or scolding her. She knew.

Never once did I say I was sorry since I wasn’t!

The rest of our time together was pleasant. My nice demeanor seemed to feed her guilt. She hung around when I did my event and occasionally brought up what she did with apologies. Yelling at someone who does something wrong puts them on the defensive. Annoyance at your tone can supercede them from taking responsibility for what they did wrong. It’s important to keep your cool when addressing inappropriate behavior so your point gets across without emotion.

Addressing the issue in a calm, amicable way gives the person who did wrong the most guilt and the most chance for them to take more responsibility for their behavior. Scolding makes them turn on you.

I found it funny when I felt a little guilt about leaving on Saturday. But it passed very fast. A little of my old DoorMat tendencies came out but I saw and conquered them! It’s important not to hurt others but even more important not to hurt yourself. I gave Liz over 20 minutes. I had no reason to feel guilty. So the feeling passed quickly! I didn’t go up there for her and I was entitled to have the relaxing lunch I came for.

Many of us were brought up thinking that it’s polite to wait for people who keep us waiting. It’s not. They’re the rude ones!

Now I understand it’s my choice to wait or do what I have to do and leave the person who’s late in the dust. I understand that things happen that are beyond someone’s control. But Liz just wasn’t ready when I said I’d be there. Not my problem and I wasn’t waiting longer. I took responsibility for agreeing to meet her in that spot instead of going directly to the restaurant. But I had to leave when I realized she wasn’t respecting my limited time.

Don’t feel obligated to buy into other people’s bad habits. If waiting doesn’t inconvenience you too much, wait a while. But we don’t have to wait indefinitely for someone who doesn’t call and does what they please. It’s your time so why waste it?? When you deal with people’s lateness, they often learn. Otherwise, it’s your choice to make plans with them.

I have NO regrets for leaving, except that I didn’t leave sooner. ☺

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More Murphy’s Law

My last post addressed how the Law of Attraction fuels Murphy’s Law when you allow yourself to be immersed in things going wrong and your thoughts expect more things to go wrong. It’s funny because writing that post, made me realize that lately I’ve been on edge waiting for more negative stuff to hit.

I have a book due in July that needs my attention. I have an article to write that’s due next week for a magazine I’ve always wanted to write for. My first assignment for them! But I can’t get to it! With 2 new books, promotion opportunities can be draining. Everyone needs something from me! I haven’t had time to write this blog. Emails from people who’ve read my book pile up in my inbox. Just when I think I can do some writing, I get requests for more things that are needed immediately.

A lot of my time is drained trying to support my family through health issues. My brother-in-law is going through a major fight against cancer. This week my daughter had a last minute surgery. She's fine now but I had to help her out. My allergies kicked in on Monday. I haven’t been sleeping well since I’ve been so stressed about not having time for what I need to do. I got sick last weekend.

Yada Yada Yada! After writing my post, I heard myself talking to someone about it all and hated how I sounded. I was bringing it on with my thoughts!

And so I followed the suggestions I wrote about. I became aware and decided to stop the pattern. Last Wednesday, I affirmed that this is the first minute of the rest of my life and I CHOOSE to have everyone in my family, myself included have positive health and healing.

No more health issues that aren’t going well!

I also affirmed that my schedule is lightening and I’ll get everything done that I need to. So I’m finding time to write this post and will do my best to continue. My primary focus is the book I’m writing. Will spend most of my time on that today. But I’m focused on attracting good news and good actions. No more Murphy’s Law in my own life! After I affirmed this, I began to feel better and sleep better. My daughter’s surgery went well and she came right home.

Yesterday I had to to speak upstate and drove up in a car I borrowed. I love to drive. Living in Manhattan I don’t need a car so this was a treat! Driving gives me a chance to get my thoughts together. It relaxes me. Afterward I took advantage of shopping opportunities. We don’t have Walmart, Target and many other chain stores that people assume are everywhere. They were all within half a mile of each other so I had a shopping frenzy. Got a lot of things I wanted from these stores.

Manhattan may have lots of designer shops, Macy’s, Bloomingdales, Lord and Taylor, etc., but there aren’t places to get some of the basics easily, like thread or potting soil.

Having a car allowed me to get things I can’t bring home when I visit a friend who lives out of the city and we shop. Even though I was tired on the way home, I even stopped in IKEA to get a chair I’ve been wanting. When I returned to the city, I used affirmations to attract a good parking spot by my apartment. It’s hard to find one on a Saturday evening but I expected one and there it was, first time around the block. Just found out that my brother-in-law doesn’t start the next phase of his cancer treatment till June so I’ll have three weeks of calm on that front to focus on my writing.

My post on Murphy’s Law reminded me to follow my own lessons. It opened my eyes that I needed to change my thoughts, and I did!

People often think I know it all and follow all the lessons religiously. But if that were true, I wouldn’t call myself a recovering DoorMat, I’d be a former one. Anyone can backslide when things get tough. It’s easy to hurt yourself without realizing it if you’re wallowing in self pity or feeling completely overwhelmed like I’ve been. I’m grateful that I woke up and even more grateful to be consciously connecting to God very strongly again. I've been too tired to think about it. Unlike the old DoorMat, even when I fall back into old patterns, my self-love is strong and helps me recover fast.

Today really is the first minute of the rest of my life and I CHOOSE to have only positive experiences and health for both me and my family!

Since I declared this on Wednesday, I did a corporate talk that went over super well (I’m still hearing from the attendees!), my daughter is fine, I feel healthier, I just got booked to speak on a big national radio show, and I came home yesterday more relaxed than in ages. Watch your thoughts and if they aren’t positive, take charge and change them! You really do control your own destiny and how many goodies you receive. I’m in oink mode now--wanting as much as I can possibly manifest--and working on my thoughts to manifest with a vengeance. You can too! ☺ Join me!

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Law of Attraction in Action: Stopping Murphy’s Law in Its Tracks

This is post 38 in my series on the Law of Attraction in Action. You CAN use your power to attract all that you need. I do it every day! Read the posts in this series to see how.

How many times has something gone wrong, and then something else goes wrong? I’ve had times when it seems nothing goes right. I used to say that I was having a Murphy’s Law day—where it seemed like anything that could go wrong did. Back then I didn’t realize that my thoughts fueled Murphy’s Law.

When you see things going wrong and expect the next shoe to drop, it probably will. The Universe hears your expectation loud and clear and the Law of Attraction supports it.

People refer to Murphy’s Law as a belief that if anything can go wrong, it will
 go wrong. If you drop 3 pieces of buttered bread, all 3 will always land on the buttered side. I’ve also referred to Murphy’s Law as going from one bad luck situation to another. I get out late, then my elevator is slow, so I miss my train and my client falls through. That kind of chain of events is common. But it happens much more often when the first negative puts the expectation of more negatives into your thoughts.

When you let one negative experience create expectations of more things going wrong, you tell the Law of Attraction to bring on what you don’t want.

It’s so easy to succumb to the frustration of having things go wrong. It seems like our learned instincts is to let those kind of things bring us down. Even with all I know, I still go there sometimes. Feeling down from something not working out puts me in a bad mood, if I let it. Then my bad mood darkens my thoughts and expectations. “Well if this could go wrong, this and that will probably tank too!” Then when it does, it’s Murphy’s Law sabotaging me. But it’s not!

Expecting Murphy’s Law (the worst case scenario) to occur is YOU sabotaging YOU!

I get it now and try to stop the patterns when I see them happening. It’s not good to create negatives! I had a friend who I silently called Murphy. She was a lovely woman but her thoughts consistently made her life difficult. One day she told me:

"Everything keeps going wrong in my life. It began with my boyfriend deciding he had enough of New York. He moved far away to begin a new life without me. I cried for weeks and still feel like life hates me. I don’t seem to deserve happiness. After Bill left, I wondered what would go wrong next. Right after, my company relocated to a place I didn’t want to live in. So now I’m out of a job. What next? That same week my rent got raised so high that I have to move. This morning my toaster caught fire and is ruined and I broke the glass carafe for my coffeemaker. And my sister is sick and needs me to take care of her in my spare time.

I keep wondering what will go wrong next. Why do I have such bad luck?"

Hello! I tried to tell her it was her thoughts giving her that bad luck but she kept defending them and putting out more negative expectations. No matter what I said, she whined and moaned about how everything bad always happens to her. Loud and clear to the Universe. And the Law of Attraction brought her the bad luck she was expecting.

Murphy’s Law is no more than your negative thoughts coming to fruition.

If you watch the bread fall and think “I bet all the slices will land on the buttered side, they will.” When I drop my bread, I repeat “buttered side up” as they fall, and they always land that way. On Sunday I was riding home from a day out with family in New Jersey. The driver turned on the radio and heard about very long backups at the bridge we were heading to. He said, “It never fails. No matter what time I go home, the bridge is backed up.”

I cut him off and asked him to think happy thoughts since I expected smooth traffic all the way home.

Whenever he expressed concern, I stopped him with a positive expectation. He promised to work with me and was shocked but happy to find no major traffic by the time we got to the bridge. It was what I expected and I kept his thoughts from sabotaging that. Next time you’re having a Murphy’s Law moment:

* Recognize it. Awareness is key to preventing the negatives.

* Choose to stop it. Your thoughts are YOUR choice. Only you can change the course of Murphy’s Law. Make sure you see the bread falling butter side up.

* Do positive affirmations. Since it’s hard to think 2 thoughts at one time, affirmations can take the place of negative expectations. “Good things are happening for me.” “I have very good luck.”

* Break a Murphy’s Law chain with a declaration. When one thing after another goes wrong for me, I take the energy from my anger and frustration and with emotion, declare, “That’s it! No more negatives! This is the first minute of the rest of my life and I CHOOSE to have things go very positively from here on.” It always breaks the cycle. Always! I say it with the fury I feel and the strong desire to change the pattern.

You have the power to have a Murphy’s Law free life, or at least to curtail any patterns that begin. When something goes wrong, instead of letting the negatives create your thoughts, allow positive expectations to heal your situation. Nip negatives in the bud right away so they don’t pervade your life.

I love having the power to turn my life around. You do too. Use it can create a life that attracts lots of things to feel joyous about!

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Law of Attraction in Action: Swine Flu Panic

This is post 37 in my series on the Law of Attraction in Action. You CAN use your power to attract all that you need. I do it every day! Read the posts in this series to see how.

It’s all over the news—the swine flu scare. Is it a dangerous epidemic? Or worse, a pandemic? People are panicking. They’re wearing masks. Schools are closed. The newspapers and TV outlets are having a field day with this story. But, is it really necessary?

Absolutely NO! The news media plants these thoughts in out heads and pushes us to send the fear of contracting swine flu out to the Universe. That’s what stimulates the Law of Attraction to help it spread.

The panic that the swine flu scare creates attracts more panic. Thinking about the flu attracts more.

The regular flu kills many thousands of people a year. One estimate I heard was it averaged 500 people a week dying in the U.S. from flu related illness. We have flu going around every year. The cases of swine flu in the U.S. have been mild. Right now there aren’t that many and it isn’t spreading as fast as the media would like you to think. Yet the news builds up the scare and we buy into it. Nobody likes getting the flu but it’s normal for it to go around. This one doesn’t seem any worse than what’s gone around before, but never before has technology made it so easy to spread information—and fear.

Yet as we hear the flu isn’t spreading fast and the people who have it are recovering easily, there’s panic going on. All the media hype keeps it alive in your mind. It’s hard to get away from it but I try to. I mute reports and change the radio or TV channel if there’s another special on swine flu. I already know that I won’t get it, since it’s my intention not to. I have strong faith that the Law of Attraction will support this.

People tend to overreact to situations that are built way out of proportion by the media. But collectively, they help the Law of Attraction to spread the flu.

Or, collectively, you can help the Law of Attraction to stop it from spreading with your intentions.

My drugstore in midtown Manhattan has face masks prominently placed for sale. I see people wearing them in the street. Swine flu continues to dominate the news. School districts are closing schools for a week or two. Everywhere people talk about this illness like it’s deadly. Some people stopped shaking hands. I still do because I KNOW I’ll be fine. Panic makes people behave irrationally. I'm acting in faith.

Panic says that you don’t trust you’ll be okay. That attracts more feelings of fear or getting the flu or whatever it is that makes you panic.

The first outbreak got me momentarily nervous since they emphasized how the majority of cases are in NYC and I live here. It sounded awful. But, then I thought about it rationally and paid more attention to the good news—that people aren’t getting very sick. An overreaction to something that sounds scary can be controlled if you CHOOSE to. If you feel panicky about swine flu, or any other situation:

* Slow down and take deep breaths. This will calm you and help you to think more rationally.

* Stop talking about it or listening to reports. If all the news reports about swine flu are making you scared, turn them off! If people discuss it, either change the subject or walk away. Don’t let it stay in your consciousness to attract more stress or other negatives that your thoughts might attract.

* Consciously identify exactly what you’re scared of. Getting the flu? Having your city shut down. A loved one getting sick? Or the thought of it? Very often all the panic created makes you scared of the unknown or you just catch the panic and let it run you.

* Take extra special care of your health, which I think you should do every day without a flu scare. Good health is armor against getting sick. It also feels better so you have more strength to deal with what scares you.

* Tell yourself that everything will be fine. It will be if you let it! Do affirmations about your good health and everyone you know staying healthy or being fine. Thank God for it.

* Trust that you will be fine. This is a hard one if you’re faith isn’t strong. I speak from a place that I regularly put myself into God’s hands and know I’m safe. That’s the best place to be to allow the Law of Attraction to work for your highest good!

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Playtime!

Lately I’ve been working longer hours than usual. Part of it has been to compensate for time spent at the hospital to support my loved one with cancer and other family obligations. A lot of people count on me to be their rock. I try my best not to neglect those I care about. But in doing this and trying to get my writing done, I’ve been neglecting me!

When being kind and helpful to others, it’s important to give enough to YOU!

I realized I’ve been automatically passing on getting together with friends when I have free time so I can catch up on my work. I do need to catch up but I can’t sacrifice all my playtime! Doing that mimics my behavior when I was a DoorMat and I don’t intend to return to that mentality! That’s why being conscious of your behavior is so important. It’s normal to get onto auto-pilot when you’re busy and trying to fit all your obligations in.

We often do things by rote—out of habit—without realizing that we’re hurting ourselves. Pay attention!

The other day a friend called to invite me to a special event. He’s a TV producer and was going to an evening with the cast, writers, and other people from the award-winning TV show, Damages. My first inclination was to say “no.” It was my only free night. I planned to stay home and write. But I caught myself. I needed some fun! I haven’t had much lately. So I took a deep breath, pushed away all the reasons I shouldn’t go, and accepted the invitation.

Making plans to do something fun can get you smiling. It sure did for me. that’s healthier than passing on fun to get more work done.

Once I knew I was going, I looked forward to it. I always enjoy spending time with a friend. The event began at 7. When he asked if I could meet him at 6 so we could be early and get good seats, I hesitated. That meant leaving at 5:30 and would cut out some of my work time beforehand. But I caught myself and said yes. It was empty when we arrived. Had I not been conscious, I might have been upset that it wasn’t necessary to arrive so early.

I could have gotten more done. But instead, I enjoyed my conversation with a friend. And we ended up sitting in the center of the first row!

The discussion was fascinating. Ted Danson and Glenn Close were literally right in front of me. I’ve met many celebs so I wasn’t star struck by them but it was FUN. I could see the twinkle in Danson’s eyes when he told jokes. Seeing Glenn Close like that was a special trip for me. When the movie Fatal Attraction came out, I got stopped all the time and told I looked like a dark haired version of her in that film. My hair was curly like hers was in the film back then. Kids would come up to me and say I looked like the lady with the knife. I heard it hundreds of times but couldn’t see the resemblance.

Until now. I saw it—just a little—in her profile. As she spoke, I noticed a bit of a similarity. It’s more in the shape of our faces than our features. Not enough to merit all the comparisons in my opinion, but of course that was years ago. It was FUN to see her and try to find some resemblance. And FUN to be out and go for a bite after at an outdoor café. I can get lost in my work. I’m glad I realized how much I needed to play!

Playtime is important, even for adults. We can get caught up in obligations and forget to have FUN.

People Pleasers make that a lifestyle. Everything revolves around others when you live in DoorMatville. But it’s not hard to change with consciousness and desire. Pay attention to how much you give. Then think about how much playtime you take. If you can’t remember when you last had some or you only need one hand to count all the recent FUN times, make some plans to play!

I’m making a more conscious effort to include downtime and playtime in my schedule. Make that effort too! Life is too short to not enjoy it.

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