Tips, Tools and Perspective for Being More Empowered

Welcome to my self-empowerment blog--as seen in The Huffington Post Guide to Blogging! I used to be a wimp and never got taken seriously. When I became one of the first chicks to start a record label, I learned to navigate the male dominated music industry and earned respect, without raising my voice or getting overtly tough. I transferred those skills into all areas of life and now get what I want from most people. I'll share those lessons here by talking about my observations of situations and habits that hold both men and women back from being as empowered as possible. I'll also give tips for more effective communication, handling yourself with more confidence, and in general, how to come across as more serious--whether it's at work, dealing with an annoying phone company, your mother, a romantic partner and anyone else you want to feel more in control with. Everybody can use more tools for taking control of their lives, like in my latest book, Nice Girls Can Finish First (McGraw-Hill). Please subscribe if you'd like more!

Friday, September 14, 2007

Take No Prisoners!


Have you felt envy toward someone? Come on, admit it! We all sometimes yearn to have what someone else does. Did you wonder why he has so much luck? Or wish she’d fall on her face since it isn’t fair for someone else to get so much when you have none of it?? That’s a normal reaction. But those thoughts make you a prisoner. Each is a bar that holds you back from getting what you say you want.

Franklin D. Roosevelt said, “Men are not prisoners of fate, but only prisoners of their own minds.”

Your thoughts manifest your reality. If it’s possible to get something and you think you can, you can. If you spend your thoughts on:

All the reasons you can’t—then you wont be able to.
Wishing you had what others do—prepare to live in a state of wishing.
Making excuses or blaming situations for what you don’t have—enjoy being a victim of your thoughts!

I used to do all of the above in my DoorMat days. I thought nothing would go right for me and nothing did. My thoughts were dismal:

I can never find the right people to help me.
Why, oh why, don’t I have the guy or the job or the anything else someone had.
Thinner girls got more than me.
Woe is me, I’ll never be happy.

Yada, yada yada! Thoughts can keep you stuck or you can force yourself to change them and use them to unlock doors. Unless you like being a victim. That gives you more time to vege at the TV or online and gain weight that can later be used to fulfill expectations that victimhood creates in your thoughts. Those thoughts are the real evil doers. I quickly say a positive affirmation when one comes to mind.

“I can do anything I choose to do.”
“I’m as happy as I make myself.”
“I refuse to let evil doer thoughts hold me back!”

Most people can’t have 2 thoughts at the same time. So block out the evil doers with something better until you break the habit of thinking victim thoughts. You can conquer those thoughts by consciously choosing to. It’s fun to watch how much you can get when you do. Now I control my mind, instead of letting it keep me in prison. Freedom in thinking allows you the opportunity to follow your passions! Then you have to do the work to manifest them. This former DoorMat is living that life now and it rocks!

2 comments:

Penelope said...

Hi, Daylle. Congratulations on the new blog. And I really like this advice about getting rid of the bad thought.

We can make our bad thoughts so complicated -- like trying to figure out why we have them, what their deep meaning is, etc. Or we can just tell ourselves to get rid of them.

Tuning out negativism and fear is so hard to do, but when I can do it, I am able to get so much of what I want.

Penelope

Clubbs said...

Hello there! I am inviting members of Priscilla Palmer's Personal Development List to participate in a blog series based on the Desiderata. I hope you'll consider participating. Here is a link describing the project: Help Wanted: Desiderata Series. Thank you and have a great day.